It never fails. I get super-focused for a deadline, meet the deadline and feel really, really good about it. And then I crash. Does this happen to anyone else? After the Holiday Open House last week, which I will blog about as soon as I get back on my feet, I just hit The Wall. Motivation escapes me and snack foods call my name during times that used to be used to create. It doesn’t help that I’m still feeling the effects of severe sleep deprivation, both from meeting the deadline and caring for my diabetic daughter in the middle of the night (blood sugar checks, hypoglycemia treatment…oh what fun!). It’s not that I don’t WANT to create. It’s that I feel drained and unable to focus. I want to think that’s normal. That taking a break from the creativity-productivity treadmill is appropriate, normal and even helpful after a very productive period. And, if I look at history: college exams, deadlines for other jobs, and the infancy period in motherhood, I see that this is normal. But it still doesn’t keep me from feeling at loose ends and a teeny bit unhappy.

Although I could barely see straight the two weeks before the Open House, I really enjoyed being that focused and getting so much done. And, not only was it good for business/creative productivity, it leaked over into domestic productivity as well. Nobody went without clean underwear, the “floor food” under Petunia’s booster seat was cleared on a regular basis and the house was generally in a good state. Is it that I feel a kind of masochistic joy in pushing myself that hard? Or my flaming perfectionism manifesting itself? Not sure. But what I do know is that I can’t keep it up for long so, for now, I’ll be enjoying some snack foods and contemplating my next move.